Tony: "Tiffani I think you need help!"
Tiff: "I don't need help, I need new friends!!!!!!!!!! *pause* what are you looking at? What are you looking at? What am I doing..."
Sly: "Go figure. I'm in the girls' locker room and I'm not happy."
Sam: "Hello number 14..." (when Sam and Lorena were spying on the boys in the girls locker room)
Harley and the Marlboro Man
Jake: [with wads of gum in his mouth] "Iwantamigarish!"
Sam: "He said 'Iwantamigarish!'"
Mark: "I think he asked for sugarless."
Jake: [spits out the gum] "No, I said I want a cigarette."
Sam: "Nope, he definitely said 'I wantamigerish!"
Sly: "I said yo baba yo baba yo baba boom boom boom."
Jake: "You make me crazy!"
Lorena: "You make me crazier!"
Jake: "You make me sick!"
Lorena: "You make me nauseous!"
Jake: "You infuriate me!"
Lorena: "I like you."
Jake: "I like you more." (They kiss)
The Last Gig
Jake: "I don't get it Tiff I mean this is it - the real deal and you guys are walking away, it's like the "Dreams" were nothing but a little garage band".
Tiffani: "Jake that's not true, the "Dreams" was one of the best part of lives, but for us it was one part and now we're ready to go explore the other part".
Jake: "But we all dreamed of making your dreams don't just change over night".
Tiffani: "They didn't they just changed so slowly that none of us noticed".
Jake: "I don't know if I can do it"
Tiffani: "Of course you can do it."
Jake: "No, I don't know if I can do it alone. Sometimes I fell like I'm nothing without you guys".
Tiffani: "You listen to me Jake Sommers. You can do this. Part of what made the "Dreams" so great is how strong it made each one of us."
Jake: "Yeah but without Winkle I'll have nobody to yell at."
Tiffani: "We're all scared the thought of being apart is impossible but we have to do this".
Jake: "Your right I have to sign that contract. What about us? We're not gonna make it are we?"
Tiffani: 'I don't see how we can. I'll be in Hawaii and you'll be playing concerts all over the world."
Jake: "I'm gonna miss you so much."
Tiffani: "Me Too" (They Hug)
Tiff: "Oh no! I'm a terrible leader! In girl scouts, I was assigned to take the troop on a nature walk, I got us so lost I was the first scout to ever get court marshaled!"
Sly: (while laughing) "What did they do? Take away your cookies!?"
"Ba-ram-dee Boom dee eh. We got a gig to play. At Sharkey's next Friday. Jake write a new song. Otay!"
Jake: "This is kinda cool, huh???"
Tiffani: "Yeah we love each other so much we sacrificed our most valuable possessions!!
Both: "I WANT MINE BACK!!!!!!"
Sly: "Hey, guess what?"
Mark: "Your running for prom Queen."
Sly: "Yes, I'm running for prom Queen in the land of make believe, why don't you go there now and vote for me?"
Mark: "What if I wanna vote for somebody else?"
Jake: "Uh, Tiff, I really wanted to make up for last year and make this the best prom ever, but-"
Tiff: "But, just because we're not in school doesn't mean we still can't have the best prom ever."
Jake: (smiling) "You'll always be my prom queen, Tiff."
Treasure of PCH
Mark: "I have to be more sneaky, more underhanded. More like a Winkle!"
Mark and Sly: "Gotta find the money, gotta find the money, gotta find the money."
Sam: "Wait a second. These clues were supposed to be made in the fifties, but no one started calling sharks Jaws until the movies came out in the seventies."
Tony: "My, my, my." (Jake & Lorena turn around)
Sly: "Look at you two, fighting like greedy, selfish animals over raw meat. Dis-gusting!!"
Jake: "I take it these diamonds are fake?"
Sly, Tiff, Mark, Sam, & Tony: "Yep."
Lorena: "So you guys were just getting us back for what we did to you?"
Sly, Tiff, Mark, Sam, & Tony: "Yep."
Jake: "And I'll bet you enjoyed seeing us fighting like greedy, selfish animals."
Sly, Tiff, Mark, Sam, & Tony: "Umm, yep."
The Princess and the Yeti
Tony: "My passion is all the heat I need."
Tony: "Mr. leather boy's gonna be so cold, we're gonna be able to rent him out as an ice sculpture."
Jake: "I'm not gonna be cold. I'm wearing long underwear."
Mark: "Oh how sweet. Do they have little motorcycles on them?"
Jake: (Grabs Mark's shirt) "As a matter of fact, they do. Got a problem with that?"
Mark: "No, no. I was just going to ask if I could borrow them later."
Tony: "Why Jake, I do believe pink is your color."
The Sly Who Came to Dinner
Matt: "This is great!"
Sam: "A D-minus is not great."
Matt: "Sly typed up his doctor's note."
Tiff: "You mean he's been faking it."
Matt: "Dad's gonna love this."
Tony: "Are you alone, Garrison?"
Surfboards and Cycles
Sly: "Face it Jake, she's turned you into mushy man already" (Jake walks towards Sly and shoves his face into the iced cake)
Jake: "Still think I'm Mushy Man?"
Sly: "Absolutely, before Tiff You would have shoved candles up my nose and lit them."
"Super Duper!" - Tiffani, "Surfboards & Cycles"
Tiffani: Well I can't sing it because what he wrote isn't true."
Jake: "Oh, like you meant what you wrote."
Tiffani: "Hey! I meant more than you meant, back when I thought you meant more than you really meant."
Jake: "Even if I knew what you meant, I still wouldn't think you meant it. So there!"
Matt: "Thanks a lot Sam, that was my story."
Sam: "I'm sorry. I just couldn't help myself. My brain wanted you to to tell them but my mouth just wouldn't."
Jake: "So now are you going to tell her? " (Lorena)
Jake: "Why not?"
Sly: "At the gig,I promise I'll tell her at the gig." (Sly walks toward the door)
Jake: "Where are you going now?"
Sly: "To cancel the gig."
Dancing Isn't Everything
Sly:" Ba- Ba- "
Sly: Oh, yeah."
Stand By Your Man
Mark (with 2 French fries in each side of his mouth): "Hey guys, look at me...I'm a walrus!"
Tiff: "It says here to talk to some guy named Mel. I hope he's here."
Mark: "Lets ask him."
Jake: "Guys we're in a garage, a big hairy greasy guy is over there. Hey, yo Mel."
Guy: "I'm not Mel, that's Mel." (points to pretty woman)
Mark/Jake: "That's Mel?!?"
Tiff: "That's it, I'll pay for your insurance."
Jake and Tiff: "What you did doesn't bother me what bothers me is the fact that you didn't trust me."
Two Too Much
Jake: "I'd like to start dating you again but you have to promise that you won't hurt me."
Jake: "If you promise you wont hurt me I'll break up with Lorena."
Tiffani: "Wow, Aren't I a lucky girl?"
Jake: "That was sarcasm right?"
Tiffani: "So you want us to just be friends?"
Jake: "Best friends."
Tiffani: "Jake, if you want a best friend, get a dog."
Tiffani: "I wish it could be different."
Jake: "I'm sorry...giving more right now is just too hard." (walks away and closes door)
Jake: "Its not that hard, I love you Tiffani."
Jake: "Na, man forget the song, I can write millions more like that one. But I can never get back what I just lost."
Sam: "It means you've been cursed with bad luck."
Tony: "Heh, heh." (goes into kitchen and then slips down)
Sam: "Tony, are you all right?"
Tiffani: "What happened?"
Tiffani: "You mean the rose bushes?"
Tony: "Yeow! Ow!"
Sly: "You guys go ahead. I'll catch up with Thorny Butt."
Father Knows Bets
Sly: "Oh, my money, you mean so much to me!"
Jake: "If you sing that stupid song again I'll drown you in the sea!"
Sly: "Alright, I made up Baboom. The next person that says it has to pay me a dollar."
Tony: "Baboom, baboom, baboom. Bill me."
Boys R Us
Sly singing: "Ba Boom I got a job today, boogie boogie boo!"
Sam: "Every day in every way he just gets weirder and weirder."
Follow Your Dreams
"Ya-ah!" (stepping in front of Lorena, blocking her way)
Lorena: "Are you looking for something?"
Sly: Yeah. "I'm searching for my aptitude and, ba-boom; you're it."
Lorena: "Listen, Ferret-boy! If Cupid himself came down and shot me full of arrows, I'd still think you're a cockroach!"
Jake: "Well since he's gone I guess we should divvy up the stuff he left us in his will."
Gang: "Jake how could you? Tony's our friend"
(Jake points to where Tony's hiding) "Oh yeah, good idea."
Tiff: "Yes, I've always wanted his drum set."
Mark: " I've always wanted his funky clothes."
Sam: "And I've always wanted a new boyfriend, come to mamma Woo monkey boy."
Tony: "One Winkle, Two Winkle, Three Winkle, Four...If your date see this room she's gonna run for the door!"